She Gave Him a Roof Over His Head — He Tried to Reclaim the Baby’s Room

Helping relatives in tough times often comes with invisible strings. You think you are offering temporary shelter, not signing up for conflict over square footage. Yet when pride and entitlement enter the picture, even a spare bedroom can become a battleground.

After her brother and sister-in-law lost their rental home, this homeowner welcomed them in with one clear condition. They would take the furnished guest room, no rearranging the house.

What started as mild grumbling about space soon escalated into demands that involved her infant son’s bedroom. Harsh words were exchanged, feelings were hurt, and extended family began picking sides.

Now she is questioning whether telling them to accept the room or leave makes her unreasonable. Scroll down to decide who crossed the line.

After losing their home, a couple moved in and clashed over bedrooms

New Mom Lets Brother Move In, He Tries to Evict Her Baby From His Own Room — not the actual photo

'AITA for not giving my brother (and wife) the bigger room?'

My brother’s wife lost her job. Which has caused them to lose the house they were renting.

My brother asked if he could stay with me. I talked to my bf and he said sure.

So, I told my brother yes, BUT he can’t bring any of their furniture with them. We don’t have any room for any of it.

Our spare room has a bed and dressers in it already. He’ll have to find a place to store their things.

He wasn’t happy about it, but said okay and that was that.

When they started moving their clothes and whatnot in, they started complaining about how small the room was.

I ignored it, because they were used to a rather large house.

And I was sympathetic, because I know how it feels to go from having everything to nothing.

I apologized and told them that this was the best we had.

Issue: My son was in his room, and started crying. I went in there to check on him, and my brother got MAD.

I usually keep his door closed when he’s napping(I have a baby monitor) and I guess my brother saw how ‘large’ his room is.

It’s not big, at all. By any means. It’s just bigger than the spare room.

He asked “why the hell” we gave him the small room when we can just move our son into the spare room.

I told him I’m not moving my son and all his things into a different room when the spare bedroom is perfectly fine for the two of them

as long as they don’t try to move their entire house into one room.

He got mad. She got mad. They threw a fit. Then my brother asked why we don’t move my son into our room.

I told him that my son’s crib won’t fit in our room. And again, I’m not moving him just to accommodate them.

The last week or so has been very...tense. Small comments here. Cold shoulder there.

Petty shoulder checks from his wife if we cross close together.

I’ve kept my mouth shut, because I love my brother, and I don’t want to cause trouble.

Plus, if they weren’t so pissy (I guess is the word) they wouldn’t be hard to live with.

They’ve started to complain that my son’s crying at night is keeping them awake.

Which, I get, but he’s a baby. He only wakes once a night to eat. And that’s not even all the time.

This morning it all came to a head when my brother told me I should move into the spare room

and let them have mine and my boyfriend’s room so that they don’t get woke up by the baby.

When I told him no, he started yelling. Calling me selfish and entitled.

Told me that I should let them have my room, because my son is “an annoying little s__t that keeps them up every night, all night.”

I saw red. Let me start this by saying I did NOT yell at my brother as he yelled at me.

I said “If you can’t appreciate the room you were given, you can go elsewhere.

My boyfriend and I have been more than accommodating to you. You constantly complain.

You’re ungrateful and rude. Get over yourself or get out of my house.”

ETA: I’m asking if I’m TA because my mother called and told me I’m an a__hole

for not giving the married couple the big bedroom with the connected bathroom. And apparently my other siblings agree?

ETA2: They do not pay rent. My boyfriend and I own our home and don’t pay anything on it.

They pay the difference on the electricity bill and buy some of their own groceries.

I do the majority of the cooking and all the cleaning.

ETA3: Boyfriend and I are going to talk about kicking them out tonight when he gets off work.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

OP Is Not The AH (NTA) OP Is Definitely The AH (YTA) No One Is The AH Here (NAH) Everybody Sucks Here (ESH) Need More INFO (INFO)Vote →

Few things undermine a home’s peace more than mixing stress, responsibility, and unmet expectations. When a couple voluntarily offers shelter to a family member in crisis, generosity isn’t measured just by the space provided, but by how both parties adapt to the new dynamics.

In this situation, the homeowner and her boyfriend offered their spare room on clear terms: no extra furniture and shared living space, not a hand-off of their entire household.

The conflict didn’t begin with room size. It began with expectations. The husband and wife viewed their temporary room as insufficient because they were used to a larger home.

That disappointment is understandable. But once they accepted the space, complaining about it, and later requesting the couple to rearrange their lives for comfort, it crossed into entitlement rather than adaptation.

When the brother fixated on the baby’s room being slightly larger, he ignored the practical reasons families assign sleeping spaces. Infants have recommended sleep environments for health and safety.

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that babies up to at least six months sleep on a firm, flat surface in parents’ room, not placed ad hoc in adult bedrooms, to reduce risks of suffocation or sudden sleep-related death.
Source:

That’s why the baby’s room being near the parents’ bedroom and having a proper sleep surface matters more than square footage comparison. It isn’t arbitrary, it’s caregiving responsibility.

Beyond the immediate care issue, family stress, including financial and housing strain, is well understood to affect relationships.

Research framed by the Family Stress Model shows that economic stress and related pressures can reduce marital support and increase conflict, especially when stressors like lost housing or job insecurity intersect with daily disruptions and care responsibilities.

That context helps explain why tempers flared, but it doesn’t excuse certain behaviors. Criticizing a baby, insisting that someone move out of their own room, or demanding the couple swap their primary bedroom crosses from reasonable request into disrespect.

A fresh perspective shows that generosity has limits. Hospitality is not ownership. Offering a spare room does not obligate a homeowner to restructure living arrangements entirely to benefit guests.

Healthy boundaries, including room assignments, care routines, and night noise tolerance, protect not just relationships but emotional stability.

When guests repeatedly shift from gratitude to entitlement, tension and conflict escalate. Calling someone “selfish” over defending their home is not just emotional; it signals a breakdown in mutual respect.

The deeper point is this: generosity works only when both sides acknowledge limits. Opening one’s home is kind. Expecting the homeowner to move out of her own bedroom is not. Compassion is valuable, but so is respecting the household that offered help in the first place.

These are the responses from Reddit users:

These commenters roasted the brother for insulting a baby and acting entitled

CocoButtsGoNuts − Nta. Your brother called your son, a literal BABY, an annoying s__t.

Girl you need to evict him and his wife yesterday. He does not get to cause an inconvenience in your home to your family, insult your child,

and make sleeping arrangement demands because he's bitter he has a smaller room than he wanted.

RedoubtableSouth − Calling me selfish and entitled.

That is some g__damn nerve right there to call you entitled and insult your infant son

when you are giving them a place to live and accommodating their whiney, entitled asses. NTA.

I wouldn't even call you an a__hole if you told them to be out by the end of the month.

UnicornsnRainbowz − NTA at all! I’d have lost my s__t a lot earlier and I’m a non confrontational person.

Seriously you took them into your house and gave them a room.

That wasn’t enough. They were annoyed that your son had a bigger room when it’s actually his house, not theirs.

Then they complain that your son who is both a baby and lives there is making too much noise.

Then they demand you the house owner, swaps with them. Then they insult your son.

They sound so entitled if it wasn’t your reality it would be comical.

Who can be so self important that they think the world should revolve around them?

I’m surprised your boyfriend hasn’t told him to f__k the f__k off. Don’t give him an ultimatum just tell him he’s got to go.

Tell him and his wife that you’re not interested in their self entitlement. How much rent do they pay, by the way - more than you do?

Ombre_CelloGirl − NTA. This is your house, you're literally doing them a favor and they complain about it?

Beggars can't be choosers. Why do you even need to ask this?

StarWars_Girl_ − NTA at all. They are in your home. You are doing them a favor.

People who are being done a favor should day "Thank you" and let it be it.

They could be out on the streets or in a homeless shelter.

Really, your brother and his wife need to get over themselves and work on their gratitude.

This group advised calmly giving notice before resentment ruins relationships

ScammerC − NTA, but you are entitled. Entitled to decide what room you donate to your brother.

Entitled to decide what room your baby sleeps in. Entitled to safety of your person, and how you want to be respected in your own home.

And entitled to tell them to shut up or ship out.

But you should sit them down tonight, explain that you understand their position, obviously things aren't working out,

and you are sad that you couldn't make it work. You are sorry that things got heated.

So you are giving them written notice to move for the end of November. You can't have the stress and tension.

The horrible things they say about your child, and the assaults by your SIL.

In the meantime if they find something sooner, you'll return this months rent.

Feeling-better2day − NTA. Ahhh, the hypocrisy. You’re ARE entitled to your own things that you pay for in your own house.

The “entitled” label was misapplied in this story. It is because you love your brother that you should ask him to move on ASAP.

Living together is gonna destroy your relationship. He and his wife haven’t accepted their position, and are trying to usurp yours.

In your shoes, I’d tell him that I love him with all my heart, but that I’m worried that living together a moment longer

will destroy too many relationships (uncle-nephew, BIL-BIL, etc). The way he spoke about your son/his nephew is heartbreaking.

Unfair-Policy − NTA Your brother and his wife are entitled. You are helping them through a tough time and being very generous about it.

Next thing you know, they'll tell you that they need all three rooms

and that you should find somewhere else to live while still paying for their place. Time to give them notice.

These commenters condemned the SIL’s shoulder-checking and urged eviction

djincognito − Oh absolutely NTA Shoulder checks as in she physically hits your shoulder with her shoulder?

That would have been enough for me to kick them out.

How can they be so entitled. I'm glad you stood up for yourself and family. I think it's time they leave for good.

Pixzgirl19 − NTA. You and your BF were gracious to them and they basically spat on you.

And who shoulder checks a family member? Heck no girl.

[Reddit User] − Please update that you kicked their ungrateful asses out of your house!

[Reddit User] − So your brother insults your child and his wife physically assaults you (shoulder checks) and this is your response?

You're either stupid or patient, but NTA either way.

[Reddit User] − Nta Beggars can't be choosers and I wonder how big the rooms are UNDER THE BRIDGE.

He's the entitled one and I would say you won't entertain any conversation

about that topic anymore and that they should look into living elsewhere.

Borgteddy − NTA. Your brother and his wife are guests in your house. They should be grateful that you gave them a place to stay.

They are ungrateful for wanting to take your son or even your room.

And as for they crying. If they don't want to be woken up by it they can get earplugs or move out and get a place of their own.

This commenter said OP clearly isn’t wrong and should stop doubting

GoForBrok3 − YTA for this stupid post. In what world are you the a__hole?

You own the home and are allowing your brother and sister in law to live there presumably rent free. Kick them out and move on.

Family loyalty can make boundaries feel harsh, especially when someone you love is struggling. But a roof over someone’s head isn’t an invitation to redecorate the hierarchy. This sister opened her home out of compassion, not obligation. When respect faded, so did the comfort.

Do you think her firm response was justified after her brother insulted her child? Or should she have handled it more gently for the sake of family harmony? How would you balance compassion with self-preservation in your own home? Drop your thoughts below.

Category: Relationships

After losing their home, a couple moved in and clashed over bedrooms

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THIS STORY?

These are the responses from Reddit users:

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